Everybody's story is different. Unique from the next, no two life stories are exactly the same. Where facts are similar, perceptions contrast. Though we find resemblances in many, it is the variations that define us as inimitable.
More than 8 billion people worldwide, 75% of whom are adults. In the US, 258 million persons are of drinking age. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), approximately 33% abstain from consuming alcohol, while the rest have some relationship with it.
It is in this “have some relationship...” category that our stories connect. Most of the damage we did was internal, not external, as we moved from a casual association to critical condition over time. We waffled between concerned and functioning during much of our time together. We went from social to suicidal through our decades-long courtship.
And as no single person shares the specific differences, many link to the state the experience left us in.
Though we can't reverse the past, we can learn for the present. Though history has been written, the future is clear to the author.
What we take with us today is the experience we had with our belief that, at any point, we were functioning. Sure, we maintained jobs and mortgages (sometimes) and kept relationships glued together, but they were NOT functioning as defined by any person of wisdom. They were merely existent.
To perform at function would require proper execution. We might say that all elements of our lives operated at less-than-capacity. Performance goals were set as low as our esteem. We put in as little effort as possible because our eyes and hearts were on the beverage, not the bounty surrounding us.
Thinking we were unique to this position, we plodded along depressed and helpless. Our best efforts could not change the inevitable, which we knew in our most profound depths.
Our world had gone dark, but we heard of a stream of light that had worked for others.
Reluctantly, we turned to the only direction available to us. We walked toward the light and through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous, beaten and broken. And once we started listening to others' voices over our own, we found the similarity that would ultimately deliver sanity.
Within this fellowship of the desperate, we found thousands who were more comparable than distinct. We found countless others who once called themselves functioning and had come to see themselves now as healing. Their actions led their assertions—they functioned and then proclaimed. They walked and then talked. They lived based on responsibility and integrity.
Though each individual had a distinctive relationship with the poison, this group possessed a communal theme of honest reflection followed by authentic action. We have come to understand that this is proper functioning.
Today, we perform a function. We think things through and then execute. We operate at near capacity most of the time. Performance goals are set higher than in the past. We achieve and experience life in a way that was once unimaginable. We put the effort in and get equal results. We are genuinely functioning on purpose.
And though results don’t always meet expectations, we know from within that we are legit.
We can say today that we are indeed functioning.
Thoughts and ideas for this blog post were taken and built upon from sober.coffee podcast # 160 titled “Seeking Truth: a coffee with Dr. Jeff Herten” … The session dropped 4/17/2024. Click here to hear the podcast.
Photo by Timon Studler on Unsplash
BLOG DISCLAIMER:
Alcoholics Anonymous and AA are registered trademarks of Alcoholics World Service. Inc. References to AA, the 12 steps, and 12 traditions does not mean that AA has reviewed or approved the contents of this publication nor that AA agrees with the views expressed herein. This publication is intended to support personal growth and should not be considered a substitute for healthcare professionals' advice. The author’s advice and viewpoints are their own.