Right before Thanksgiving (2022), we threw out six-party tips for the sober inside all of us.
Now is a great time to release part 2 in the series, which can be reviewed before action treads misery. -- Simple things to do and not to do when attending holiday get-togethers.
As we said in part 1, some of what we share here seems straightforward logic but bears mention. All things we share here we've tenderly stolen from the rooms of AA from our brothers and sisters in sobriety. If one works the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, these six new suggestions will be natural and normal responses.
So, prepare to party:
Don’t bring your past to the party - especially holiday parties.
Don’t dwell on what happened “last year” - focus on being a great party guy this year - If people bring the past up – say, “that was then…” and move on. You are not your past; as time unfolds, people will realize that. Some memories fade slowly, and some never fade. Look instead to creating new memories they will talk about for years.
Build memories for yourself
First, by remaining sober, you will be able to remember what happened (and didn’t happen) at the party, so build some great memories for yourself- like enjoying yourself without booze - and use those memories for fuel for the next event/party.
Practice, Practice, Practice
Figure out what you’re going to say when asked, “why aren’t you drinking.” There is not just one correct answer, as many will work. Pick yours and practice it, so you’re confident and don’t stumble around. Then, prepare a couple of good open-ended questions to ask people and practice them as well. This is a great way to change the conversation from alcohol to something else.
Focus on Others
People LOVE to have it all be about them, and it takes the spotlight off you. Focus on others – really take an interest in them - this is a quality way to build relationships, and we can almost guarantee that you will be remembered for your genuineness for a long time. So, start building!
ENJOY YOURSELF
Fun things happen at parties and family gatherings - great conversation, laughs good food, and even tasty non-alcoholic drink options. Ready for a new experience? Then jump in and enjoy. (aka: don’t sit in the corner and mourn the loss of your booze habit)
Have a smooth EXIT strategy
Set a departure time before you arrive. There is nothing wrong with a “hit-and-run.” No need to explain yourself – and don’t be afraid to be a little assertive - “gotta jet,” is what Glenn says as he hugs and takes off.
Remember, The longer we stay - the greater the risk -
For the newly sober - and those with a few 24 hours under their belt - it is always wise to be mentally and physically ready when pooled in a tank with drinkers.
Own your next step - Own your good time - Own your sobriety.
You will not regret it the following day.
Happy Holidays.
BLOG DISCLAIMER:
Alcoholics Anonymous and AA are registered trademarks of Alcoholics World Service. Inc. References to AA, the 12 steps, and 12 traditions does not mean that AA has reviewed or approved the contents of this publication, nor that AA agrees with the views expressed herein. This publication is intended to support personal growth and should not be thought of as a substitute for advice of healthcare professionals. The author’s advice and viewpoints are their own.
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